The Crush

I think everyone secretly has a crush. Doesn't matter if your married, single, there's always that one person who makes you go 'daaaaaammmmn' Whether or not you act on it, there's the difference.

I met my crush many many moons ago, through friends I don't really talk to anymore. We partied and always had a good time, he did have his bad side though partying. He would drink too much  and just cause havok.

He had always been a tortured soul and I've seen him fall in love and just drop to his knees when it didn't work out. I always felt bad for him, he was such SUCH a sweet guy and the looks were in his favour. I never understood why these girls would drop him like a sack of potatoes, and maybe I never will.

He lives in the same town as I do and would always honk and wave whenever I saw him about. Today, I ran into him at the local grocery store. It sounds terrible but I almost forgot he existed. My eyes lit right up when I saw him and wasted no time catching up. I was very quick to tell him of my new-found single life and hell, why not drop the pregnancy ball while I was there. Maybe I was looking for empathy, maybe I was looking for support...who knows, I really gotta work on these things.

He kept telling me how sorry he was to hear about everything's that happened. Here I am twirling my hair, smiling wayyyy too much while informing him of my shit life. HA.

We kept kinda running into each other in each aisle and yes at the icecream aisle, I asked if he was still single. I chalked it up to "hey last time I talked to you, you were dating [insert name here]. You guys still together?" I knew FULL WELL they weren't, hell, my ex went to his house to console him when they broke up. (When I say console, I mean drink their faces off), but it was my way of trying to find out if he was single. Pretty sneaky eh? He told me nope, he's single now just living day by day.

I also asked him if he was still up to his crazy ways. I've seen this guy fall through a window once hammered. He told me he's cleaned up and that person is gone. He just wants to settle down....*swooon*

He asked how my son was, I told him he was taking the break-up hard. WHY DO I KEEP BRINGING THIS UP?! MY God woman! You want this guy, stop talking about it! You could be saying 'oh he's learning to count, knows most of his colours, but nooooooo' And that he was going to be 3 next month. He started asking me how my job was going...again, nothing good to say, I'm off on injury. I quickly said our goodbyes because I felt like a giant asshole and would totally rewind that entire conversation if I could.

However, I did tell him I missed hanging out with him and if he's ever in the neighbourhood, to stop on by. He said 'alright' however, we have invited this guy out so many times and he never shows up so I'm not banking my luck on it.

Until next time.....I'll have to start working on my social skills.