Ask me anything..

Well it's been a while......ok like 4 months and I know quite a few of you wondered where I went. Well to say it's complicated would be the understatement of the year. So here's some answers to your questions:

Where the hell did you go?
I'm still here! Alive and with two kiddies now.

How's life with 2 kiddos?
You know to be completely honest, itty bitty baby is the best baby on the planet. He has slept through the night since day one and the transition from 1 to 2 kiddos went pretty well. Child # 1 absolutely adores him. I probably will kick myself for saying that, considering we've now entered into teething session....woot.

Are you still dating?
I can officially say I am off the market! I will get into that later on though.

How's your injury?
I'm not 100% back to normal but I'd say 90. I still have bad days and then I go and cry to my chiro and he makes me all better.

If you're not dating, what are you doing with your spare time?
Well back in November, my mom purchased a store here in my local town. Since I'm on parental leave from my other job, I go and help her out...everyday....8 hours a day.

Where does itty bitty baby go?!
He comes with me! The joys of family owned business...and good babies, everyday is bring your child to work day.

How's the relationship between you and your ex?
Honestly and I am throwing this on the table right now, it'd be 1000% better if his girlfriend stopped her spying and breaking the law ways. I won't go into grave detail...but she likes to commit felonies and no doubt, I'll give it an hour after I publish this to get a phone call reeming me out.

Are you and Pic still friends?
Absolutely! We actually went skating a couple weekends back...no blogger material though.

In "Rumour has it" you said there was a rumour you weren't going to address, will you now?
Sure why not. Ex's g/f heard through "a friend of a friend of a friend" (read between the lines, she likes to make shit up) that itty bitty baby was actually Stan's baby. Now I'm going to do a little bit of math here and I got pregnant January 20th, 2013. Now Stan and I started hanging out in April....hmm and I guess we're also missing the fact that you usually have to do deeds to get pregnant and Stan and I didn't do deeds...so, you'd think that would clear that up...clearly not.

Has your ex finally accepted itty bitty baby as his?
Yes he has.

Have you done deeds with any other of your dates?
I know this is an ask me anything session...but my mom reads this, moving along.

Do you still run into "The Crush"?
I do every once in a while, we do our small chat thing and continue on in our day. He's really letting himself go though.

We want to hear about the new man!
Alright fine, it started like any other dating session and it broke all of my rules...we chatted till the wee morning hours and again all day the next and I REALLY needed to meet him, that's not like me at all. He was cute, knew how to spell, had a career, had a car, had a house, he was separated, had kids of his own so CLEARLY this guy was bat shit crazy right?
Anyways, he was childless one sunday afternoon however, I was not and itty bitty baby was 5 weeks old (keep that number in mind). Child # 1 had just gone down for his nap and I let this guy to my house. Looking back and I tell him this all the time...I am nuts. I remember thinking as he walked to the door that "Oh my God I'm crazy, what if this guy is a psycho, what if he kills you and your children, where's the phone?! Ok, 911 ready to go if needed...Kelly you're nuts you're nuts you're nuts." DON'T DO WHAT I DID.
We sit on my couch and make chit chat. I tried breast feeding itty bitty baby but my stint in the ER made me dry up so I sat on the couch, with my 5 week old, feeding him a bottle, on my first date with this guy. Sooo classy. Baby goes to sleep and I remember getting up to put him in his swing and the MINUTE that child was strapped in, stranger danger here grabs my waste and starts making out with me hardcore. That's what we'll know him as...stranger danger.
Stranger danger was a great kisser...unfortunately, he had a 5 o'clock shadow going on and I had the BIGGEST whisker burn within 5 minutes. Now, anyone who's had a baby knows that you can't do deeds until at least 6 weeks but I would've if I could! Would that have changed anything? I asked him that and he still says he would've dated me..psycho lol.

Will we hear more about him?
Um it's hard to say. He knows about this blog and I promised not to write about him. There's actually a good legitimate reason behind it and I respect his wishes. However a whole whack load of issues in the parenting department have come up and I thought about writing about them but, I don't know. I'll show him this post and I'll see if I overstepped my boundaries.

Has child #1 met him yet?
Actually for the first time this week they had their first encounter. I did NOT want him to meet child #1 right away, for child #1 gets attached extremely easily. However, this has been the most ridiculous winter on the planet here and my toilet line froze. My dad has been working crazy hours since his work is pulling out of the area and just couldn't help, so stranger danger came to the rescue.

What do your friends think of him?
Well, to be completely honest, stranger danger and I have extremely busy schedules. We barely see each other more than twice a week for 20 minutes at a time. We have coffee together during our lunches and we might see each other for an hour on the weekend. To plan a date seems to take a month in advance notice...and even then it got cancelled/rescheduled 3 times on both our parts. It's tough! So to answer that question, my friends have not met him.

Well, I hope that answers everything!
Goodnight.